Introductions, two decades divided, combined and slightly adjusted


From the organic abstraction

to the infinite unknown,

I’m writing to tell you I believe in the bohemian dream,


The wild and free.

After the words of the beats and the gurus,

The Dharma Bums,

Riki Tiki Tavi, etc.

I’m inspired to write to you about my experiences,

What life on the farm is like,

What falling in love is like,

Letting go,

And realizing that life is so, so beautiful.

“We all need to be aware of our personal calling.  What is a personal calling?  It is [your life’s] blessing, it is the path [chosen] for you here on Earth.  Whenever we do something that fills us with enthusiasm, we are following our legend.  However, we don’t all have the courage to confront our own dream.


There are four obstacles.  First: we are told from childhood onward that everything we want to do is impossible.  We grow up with this idea, [as if everything is so beyond us, larger than life as we know it], and as the years accumulate, so too do the layers of prejudice, fear, [insignificance] and guilt.  There comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in our soul as to be invisible.  But it’s still there, [you can harvest your energy if you try].

If we have the courage to disinter dream, we are then faced by the second obstacle: love.  We know what we want to do, but are afraid of hurting those around us by abandoning everything in order to pursue our dream.  We do not realize that love is just a further impetus, not something that will prevent us going forward.  We do not realize that those who genuinely wish us well want us to be happy and are prepared to accompany us on that journey. [Those that matter don’t mind, those that mind don’t matter.]

Once we have accepted that love is a stimulus, [and should be nothing but positive energy], we come up against the third obstacle: fear of the defeats we will meet on that path.  We who fight for our dream suffer far more when it doesn’t work out, because we cannot fall back on the old excuse: “Oh, well, I didn’t really want it anyway.”  [Is that what you’re thinking?] [It’s true,] we do want it and know that we have staked everything on it. [But] the path of the personal calling is no easier than any other path, except that our whole heart is in this journey. [Just know, warrior of light, you] must be prepared to have patience in difficult times and to know that the Universe is conspiring in our favor, even though we may not understand how.

I ask myself: are defeats necessary?

Well, necessary or not, they happen.  When we first begin fighting for our dream, we have no experience and we make many mistakes.  The secret of life, though, is to [absorb everything we experience, and know it is all part of the building blocks to your full potential.  It’s the beautiful fullness of life.]

So, why is it so important to live our personal calling if we are only going to suffer?

Because, once we have overcome the defeats-and we always do, [if you are prepared to]-we are filled by a greater sense of euphoria and confidence.  In the silence of our hearts, we know that we are proving ourselves worthy of the miracle of life. Each day, each hour, is part of the good fight.  We start to live with enthusiasm and pleasure.  Intense, unexpected suffering passes more quickly than suffering that is apparently bearable; the latter goes on for years and, without our noticing, eats away at our soul, until, one day, we are no longer able to free ourselves from the bitterness and it stays with us for the rest of our lives.

Having disinterred our dream, having used the power of love to nurture it, and spent many years living with the scars, we suddenly notice that what we always wanted is there, waiting for us, perhaps the very next day. Then comes the fourth obstacle: the fear of realizing the dream for which we fought all our lives.

Oscar Wilde said: “Each man kills the thing he loves.”  And it’s true.  The mere possibility of getting what we want fills the soul of the ordinary person with guilt [and anxiety.  We aren’t used to being fulfilled.  We are always told there is something missing.] We look around at all those who have failed to get what they want and feel that we do not deserve to get what we want either.  We forget about all the obstacles we overcame, all the suffering we endured, all the things we had to give up in order to get this far.  I have known a lot of people who, when their personal calling was withing their grasp, went on to commit a series of stupid mistakes and never reached their goal-when it was only a step away.

This is the most dangerous of the obstacles because it has a kind of saintly aura about it: renouncing joy and conquest.  But if you believe yourself worthy of the thing you fought so hard to get, then you become an instrument of [life, light, positivity, happiness, energy, enlightenment], you help the Soul of the World, and you understand why you are here.”

-Paulo Coelho